


Valerie

by esmeeeeme



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, At the time it was my first, Canon Divergence - Avengers (2012), Canon-Typical Violence, Childhood Trauma, F/M, Gen, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Like waaaaaaaaaaaaay before, My First Work in This Fandom, This isn't realistic, ooc i think, sort of, written before Age of Ultron
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-31
Updated: 2016-02-01
Packaged: 2018-05-17 11:56:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 17,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5868487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/esmeeeeme/pseuds/esmeeeeme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seven-year-old Valerie Frost lived the best life. She had a loving mother and father and went to a normal school like a regular child. All seems to be going well until tragedy strikes and a revelation is told; her entire life had been a lie. Not only that... everything she knew was about to change. Starts before the Avengers.<br/>\\\\\<br/>Cross-posted from fanfiction.net, originally published on 07-20-12.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I was a fetus when I started this fanfic. Written on 07-20-12. This is an OLD fanfic, but it still has a very special place in my heart. Please don't judge my younger, happier self. The creativity little me had was amazing, so this is very dear to me. Now that I think about it, this fanfic has been with me since my freshman year of high school and now I'm a senior and now I'm getting very emotional.
> 
> Enjoy my angst.

Chapter One: Prologue

* * *

She didn't want to do this.

"Nat."

Not at all.

"Natasha, I know, you don't want to do this," Clint Barton sighed and touched Natasha Romanoff's arm.

Not even the slightest bit...

"Clint, giving up Valerie to someone else is something I don't want to do," said Natasha, refusing to look at Clint.

"I feel the exact same way. But it's for the best," he replied.

"The best?" asked Natasha.

"Do you want Valerie to be in risk from being found by enemies for the rest of her life?" asked Clint.

Natasha looked down. He did have a point there...

Natasha and Clint were A ranked SHIELD agents. They were a deadly duo envied by many and wanted dead by more. They had the right kind of chemistry to form their unique bond and friendship. Natasha and Clint knew each other like the back of their hand. She knew his secrets and he knew hers...For the most part.

Years in the business of being agents, none of them thought that they would ever in their lifetime become parents.

"Nat," Clint looked at Natasha, using his pet name for her. "I don't want to do this either. Do yo you have any idea how much it hurts as a father to do this?" asked Clint. He put his hand on her shoulder. "It's for the best, Nat. I trust Jessica and she'll take really good care of her," he assured.

"Clint..." Natasha held the small bundle in her arms.

"You can do it," said Clint.

Natasha nodded and sighed. "For Valerie," she said.

"For Valerie," said Clint.

Natasha walked forward with Clint following. He kept a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

"I'll knock," Clint said.

He knocked on the apartment door a few times.

A tall, blonde woman answered it. "Hey guys," she greeted.

That woman was Jessica Frost, ex S.H.I.E.L.D agent. After a severe hip injury she had in a mission, she retired early after serving in SHIELD for seven years. At 26-years-old, she wasn't too young or too old to appear in a new neighborhood with a one-month-old baby.

Afterall, many years of knowing and saving each others lives, she remains a close friend of both Natasha and Clint. Not only that...

She was also the now new guardian of their newborn daughter, Valerie.

"Hey," replied Clint. Natasha nodded in greeting.

"Come in," said Jessica, opening the door wider.

The agents entered. Natasha was still tense, her face neutral and posture straight. Valerie was sound asleep.

"How is it going?" asked Jessica.

"Good," said Clint.

"Good," said Natasha. She was completely against leaving Valerie with Jessica. It was not that she didn't trust her; she completely did. Jessica was one of the few agents other than Clint that she completely trusted.

Sounds very odd for the Black Widow to trust someone, but Jessica had saved her life more than a couple of times in desperate situations when Clint wasn't available. She was their moral support and never turned their back on them.

When a mission needed three people, they were the one to call. Clint and Natasha were the defense and Jessica was what SHIELD called 'karate geek'. She was a hacker and skilled karate fighter. Some missions required a knockout of the security firewalls and she was the one to punch 'em out.

Of course, that all changed one mission that had Jessica turning in her occupation as a SHIELD agent. It was all on good terms and she didn't mind. Besides, who could be running and fighting while limping the entire way? Although the agents of SHIELD were really neutral about it and understood the reasons why, they still missed their karate geek.

Not only did Jessica bring many hacking skills that were necessary to SHIELD, she also brought a little bit of spunk to SHIELD. Diligent and dedicated to her job, she was friendly to the agents and very outgoing. She had a passion for taking care of children and had babysat Phil Coulson's nieces and nephews multiple times. People could tell right away that she was going to be a great parent.

Complete opposite of Natasha.

When she had found out about her pregnancy, she wanted to abort. She was an assassin, not a mother. The Black Widow could never be a mother. She had taken too many lives...But the mere fact that she was going to be carrying one into the world for nine months was too much to handle. Clint fortunately talked her into keeping it. He didn't want his partner to end a life that hasn't even begun living in the real world. The fact that he contributed to that life...

Although Natasha had remained neutral on the outside, she began loving the baby over the course of nine months. It brought her joy, seeing the bump grow slowly. Clint was feeling happy in the inside and slowly began showing it. He was going to be a father. And he swore to be the best father there was.

But now, in order to keep the baby safe, she had, reluctantly, given the guardianship to Jessica.

"I'll be sending both of you emails of updates of how Valerie is doing. You'll be able to visit any time; as family friends," said Jessica.

"I'll be 'working in Florida', so my visits won't be that frequent," said Clint.

"How about you Natasha?" asked Jessica.

"I guess college friend," she said, her voice neutral.

"That will work," said Jessica. "I'll be moving into a new house in a couple of weeks so it won't look out of place that I have a baby."

"That will work," said Clint.

"Does the Director know about..."

"Yes. He's fully aware," said Clint.

"Good. I don't want you two to be in trouble," said Jessica with a sigh of relief.

"He was angry, but after I told him what I had told you, he cooled down. Surprisingly," he looked over at Natasha. "We didn't get fired, but Nat was under house arrest for eight months," he said with a small smile.

Natasha rolled her eyes. It was true; she was under house arrest. For eight months. But Clint wasn't the only one who suffered; he was the one going to midnight trips to the 24 hour super market around the corner for her cravings.

"Yes, but who was the one going to the store at 2 in the morning?" asked Natasha with a small smirk.

At those memories, Clint chuckled a bit and gently rubbed Valerie's head.

"Yeah, all for this little guy," said Clint.

"Girl," corrected Natasha.

"All for this little girl," said Clint.

Jessica smiled at the parents. "She looks like Clint," she said.

"Everyone says that," sighed Clint. "The doctor, the nurse, Fury, Coulson, you, Natasha," he looked over at Natasha. "I still don't see the resemblance," he said with a shrug.

"Don't deny the truth," said Natasha with a tiny smile.

"She doesn't look like me at all," said Clint stubbornly.

"She does, Clint Barton, don't deny it," said Natasha, looking down at Valerie. She, along with the said people in the stubborn archer's statement, all spoke the truth. Valerie had Clint's eyes and the same color of his hair. Ironic, since Clint named Valerie after the Zutons song and the song sang of someone with ginger hair.

"Do you have the crib ready?" asked Clint, changing the subject.

"For now, she'll be sleeping in the small portable crib in my room. But once we move in the new house, I'll set the real thing up," said Jessica.

If you squinted a little bit, you could tell see tiny similarities between Jessica and Valerie. It was all a coincidence, of course. Valerie was Natasha Romanoff and Clint Barton's daughter. Although the 'records' didn't say that, it was all true.

"Do you need any of the essentials?" asked Clint.

"Nope. I have them all. Want to see?" asked Jessica.

"Sure." Clint and Natasha stood up from the couch and followed Jessica.

Jessica's small bedroom had all the boxes of the baby essentials in the corner. The temporal crib was set up by her bed and she had diapers, wipes and the daily things needed for a baby right next to it, all stacked and organized.

"I have most of the boxes over there, but once I move in, I'll have a bigger room for her. She's one month, right?" asked Jessica.

"Yep," said Clint.

"Okay. I'll have to take her to the pediatrician soon," said Jessica.

"You have no idea how grateful we are for you to be doing this," said Clint.

"No need to thank me: we're friends. Friends stick up for each other," smiled Jessica.

The smile reassured Natasha. She felt a little bit more relaxed.

But she was still a small bit reluctant of leaving her baby.

"Natasha, you'll be able to visit any time. I promise," reassured Jessica, seeing the hesitation in Natasha's face.

"Thank you, Jessica. That makes me feel a little better," said Natasha sincere.

"Same goes to you, Clint," said Jessica.

"My visits won't be that frequent, since Fury is just gonna throw a lot of missions at me, but I'll try my best," said Clint.

"I don't want you two to feel out of Valerie's life," Jessica bit her lip.

"It's alright. You're not," said Clint.

"Thank you," said Jessica with a sigh of relief.

"I guess it's time to say our farewells. We're needed in HQ at 5," Clint glanced at the clock.

"Alright. Take your time," said Jessica, leaving the couple some privacy.

Natasha handed Valerie to Clint. "I'll miss you like crazy Val," murmured Clint as he kissed the top of Valerie's head. "Be good for Jessica... I love you kiddo," he added.

"Valerie," began Natasha. Her voice shook a little bit. "I love you," she kissed the top of her head. "I love you so much..." she whispered.

She smoothed Valerie's hair. It was already beginning to curl a little bit, almost like her own.

"I promise to visit, Valerie. I promise," her eyes began to water and she blinked the tears back. No. She couldn't show emotion or tears.

"Tell Jessica that we're leaving," said Natasha to Clint.

"Will do," he turned around and went to find Jessica.

Natasha took one last look of Valerie before she walked into the hallway where Jessica was standing.

"Thank you so much for helping us," said Clint.

"I swear on my life that I will protect her. And you know I always keep my promises no matter what," said Jessica.

"Alright," said Clint.

Natasha handed Valerie to Jessica, heartbreak arriving with a full blow.

"I trust you completely Jessica... I really do," said Natasha.

"I'm glad. I am honored to take care of such a precious person for two really great friends," smiled Jessica sincerely.

"That's great. I don't want to feel like you're being forced into this," said Clint.

"I don't feel that way," said Jessica.

"Great, with that being said," Clint turned to Natasha. "We have to go," he said.

The former Russian spy nodded and gave Jessica a careful hug, not wanting to harm Valerie.

"Take care, Jessica," said Natasha.

"Same to you, Natasha," replied Jessica.

"Goodbye."

The couple left and went into the car. Natasha sat in the driver's seat. She reached into her pocket for the keys but as she was about to turn the car on, she dropped them.

"Nat?" asked Clint.

"I don't want to leave her," tears spilled down Natasha's cheeks. "Clint..." her voice cracked. She leaned her head on the steering wheel. "I can't believe I'm actually saying this," she rarely cried. Last time she cried was when Valerie was born and that was because of the pain going into labor and giving birth gave.

She did such a hard work of carrying a child inside her, but now, instead of feeling relief, she felt regret.

"Oh Nat..." Clint reached over and brought Natasha in a comforting hug. "It's going to be alright," he said softly, wiping her tears away.

"I hope so," said Natasha with a small sniffle. "I really do."


	2. Typical Saturday Morning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Still from 2k12, don't judge me

Chapter Two: Typical Saturday Morning

* * *

"Don't make me say this one more time, Valerie. Go clean your room."

"But Mooooom."

"No ifs ands or buts. You need to clean or else no birthday party."

"But-"

"For the lord's sake, Valerie Frost, it's only your room!"

"It's still too much work!"

It was a typical Saturday morning in New York.

Well, in the Frost residence it was.

"Your room is your only resposibility!"

Valerie Frost huffed and crossed her arms. She leaned against the grey door leading to the garage. Cleaning days weren't her favorite part of the week. Or month. Or year. She would rather do anything, [scrub the floors, clean the windows, dust the bookshelves and that's saying something] than clean her room.

"I still don't like it," she replied.

As the years went and came, Valerie grew, looking more like her biological parents each day. If it weren't for the few triats that Valerie had coincidentally in common with Jessica, people would have raised some suspicions. Valerie's dirty blonde curly hair was way more different than Jessica's blonde straight hair. Jessica's sky blue eyes were different than Valerie's hazel green. They looked like two people that could never be related overall.

"Mom, you do realize that turning seven is really really important?" Valerie glanced at her mother. Well, "mother". She wasn't aware of the story of who her real mother was. If people saw them together, they would often mistake her as a babysitter, which in a way they were correct.

"Is it so important that you don't want to clean your room?" asked Jessica.

"Yes."

Jessica groaned. "Why must you make your old mother do all the work?" she asked.

"Whatever mom. You're not old."

"Honey, I'm 33. At my age, I'm not exactly the youngest mom on the block."

"Mom, you're not old," said Valerie.

"You know what would make your mom feel better?"

"What?"

"You cleaning your room."

Valerie processed the information and groaned. "Really mom? Guilt trick?" she asked.

"Just go clean your room, shortie," laughed Jessica.

"Fine..."

* * *

_Dear Nat,  
Hey! How's it going? Wow, it's been a while huh? Guess what? Valerie just took her first steps! It was amazing! I got the chance to record it on my phone. :D Kodak moment! Hope you're doing well! -Jessica_

_Dear Nat,  
Rough week. Valerie's got a cold. She's feeling a little better, but she's still sick. I'm starting to get worried. Somehow, after she got home from the park, she started to cough really hard later on that night. I'm taking her to the doctor tomorrow, since the clinic is closed on Sundays. Don't worry, it's the flu for sure. I hope you're doing well-Jessica_

_Dear Nat,  
It was the flu. She's all good now. By all good, I mean having races with the neighbors and winning like they owed her money. She's like a mini Clint... The speed, the hair, the eyes (no matter how much he denies it, it's still true) and the wit. And she has your agility, beauty and graceful-ness. Definelty your daughter. :) Not only that...she's starting to love soccer. Mind. Blown. Tell Clint that if he wants to get her into archery, may the odds be in his favor. Because she already loves soccer. That was unexpected!_

Natasha Romanoff smiled as she scrolled through the emails. It wasn't the same; reading updates about her own daughter when her friend was raising her. But it was better than nothing.

Natasha felt a warm pair of arms wrap around her.

"Hey."

She smiled a little bit and turned to Clint Barton. "Hi."

"Updates?"

"Re-reading them," replied Natasha. She often did that. Just re-reading updates for hours on end. Clint read them, but not as often as she did.

"You can visit her, y'know?" said Clint.

"Yeah... But Fury is sending me somewhere to take down a drug lord."

"And I'm being sent to a base to protect whatev er they are doing," Clint rested his chin on her shoulder and gently gave her a small kiss on the cheek.

"Her birthday is coming up," said Natasha.

"Could you go for me? It's in two weeks... I'm being sent over there for a month," Clint looked at Natasha.

Natasha turned around. "Of course. If Fury doesn't send me on a ridicilous mission," she replied. It was true. Natasha was often being sent on missions that really didn't make sense. She recently had to pose as Tony Stark's assistant. What was the point? Everyone knew he was Iron Man.

"Thanks Nat."

"No problem," Natasha said looking at the computer screen.

"I'll never hear the end of this from Val..." Clint sighed.

Natasha chuckled. "I'll tell her you got sent to Spain. That's the only place you haven't been sent anyways."

"Actually, thanksgiving of 2009. Got sent to Marruecos. You spent it with Val and Jessica."

"Close enough," said Natasha.

Clint bit his lip. "I don't like this; lying to her. She's going to have to know one day," he said.

"That her true parents are master assasins?"

Clint sighed. Natasha loved Valerie, but whenever the subject of telling Valerie the truth came up, she would always say no. But like he said, she was going to have to know one day. He just hoped when she did, she wouldn't get mad at them for lying.

"Honey, you can go and spend time with her. You have the right," Clint let got of her.

"I know."

"Well, I'll be leaving," Clint began looking for his bow.

Clint Barton was dressed in his 'mission clothes' which consisted of black pants and a black bulletproof vest. His quiver filled with arrows was on his back, ready for action.

The couple lived together, as they had been for years. They didn't show affection outside, as being in a relationship was against the rules. Although they didn't show any hints of affection during the job, that still didn't help the raising suspicions of the other agents.

"Be careful," said Natasha

"When have I ever not been careful?

Natasha smirked. "Well..."

Clint chuckled. "Don't remind me..."

"Don't do anything stupid."

"I won't."

Clint found his bow on the couch and strapped it on his back.

"I'm leaving," said Clint. He leaned over and gave Natasha a quick kiss.

"Good luck," Natasha smiled.

"Thanks." Clint smiled and got into the car that was waiting for him outside.

Natasha returned to the computer and continued reading. But inside, she was feeling lonely. She was used to Clint leaving for missions since they were both agents, but she still couldn't help but feel lonely. She never showed loneliness to the public, or anyone, but when she felt alone, it wasn't a pleasant feeling.

Her phone vibrated next to her and she saw the caller ID.

_Jessica._

"Hello?"

"Nat~!" Jessica's voice was bright and enthusiastic. Another difference from Natasha's neutral tone.

"Hey," Natasha smiled a little bit. Although sometimes Jessica's optimism annoyed her, her not used to so much happiness, she couldn't help but smile. Jessica often got excited talking to her about Valerie and that always cheered up Natasha.

Of course, it wasn't that easy.

Being wanted dead by many others around the world, Natasha had to keep her biggest secret in the darkest shadows in order to ensure Valerie's safety. No one, except for her, Jessica, Coulson, Fury and obviously Clint, knew about Valerie. To the world, Valerie was the daughter of Jessica Frost, pedritician at the clinic in downtown Manhattan.

"Natasha Romanoff! Are you deaf?" exclaimed Jessica.

Natasha blinked at the sudden outburst. "Oh. Sorry. I was lost in thought..."

"You've been thinking too much, Nat. What's wrong?" asked Jessica.

"Nothing, nothing... Just feeling a little down..."

"Oh my gosh, Nat, if it's me, I'm sorry. Knowing how dumb I can be, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm-"

Natasha chuckled. Jessica may seem like the most confident person in the world; but in reality she is the biggest nervous wreck in the universe.

"No, no, it's not that. You've been nothing but a miracle worker. Don't worry about it," Natasha replied.

"Nat, saying that to not worry about it makes me worry. Please tell me what's wrong," said Jessica.

Jessica didn't know her as much as Clint did. He knew her like the back of his hand, for the most part. Jessica knew Natasha's biggest secret; Valerie. But that didn't mean that she knew everything else Natasha hid from the world.

"I just feel a little lonely, that's all."

_Not a lie, but not the truth either._

"Mission?" asked Jessica.

"Yes."

"Y'know, you can come right over. I'm just trying to get Val to clean her room," said Jessica. "Because it's for her own good," she added loud enough for Valerie to hear.

"I don't want to!" exclaimed Valerie.

"Hush and clean or else no birthday party."

"Fine! Fine! I'm cleaning!" Valerie ran up the stairs and began cleaning.

"Kids," chuckled Jessica.

"You don't even have to tell me..." Natasha mumbled.

"Everything alright in SHIELD?" asked Jessica.

"Don't remind me..." shuddered Natasha.

The past couple of months have been absolutely chaotic for the agents and SHIELD overall. Reports from all over the world had been going in like crazy. A strange hammer appearing in New Mexico. A man who claimed to be a Norse demigod and turned out to be correct. Tony Stark declaring to be Iron Man to the world, effectively putting him in the open of many enemies. Bruce Banner suddenly going MIA after his other form caused havoc in Harlem. And a legendary hero from 77 years ago thought to be dead found in ice.

"That bad?" asked Jessica.

"Not even the beginning..." sighed Natasha.

"Give me an idea of the chaos."

"Reports coming in from all over the world of things that can't be believed."

"Every day?"

"Yes."

Jessica whistled. "My lord, you guys need a break. Too much chaos is going to affect you one day."

"Hey, you used to work here and the chaos is normal. Besdies, we're pretty much used to it," said Natasha.

"True. SHIELD has always been a place where you can deal with gamma radiated people and still drink coffee like it's nothing big."

"That sums up a typical work day."

"Indeed."

On the other side of the phone, there was a small shout. "Doorbell!" shouted Valerie.

"Coming!" called out Jessica. "Gotta go. Take care Nat," said Jessica.

"Same to you," said Natasha, hanging up.

Chats like that made her day a little brighter

* * *

Jessica hung up and went over to the window. Once she saw the visitor, she looked over at Valerie.

"Val, go to the den and don't get out of there until I tell you to," said Jessica.

Valerie was dragging the vacuum cleaner up the stairs when Jessica turned. "Huh? Why?" she asked with a frown.

"Just go and I'll explain later," said Jessica.

"What about my room?" asked Valerie.

"Later."

At the sound of that, Valerie dropped the vacuum cleaner and left it on the steps and ran up the stairs, shutting the door to the den.

But of course, every kid is curious.

Valerie opened the door as quietly as she could and leaned against the wall. The thing about her home that she always liked was that the walls were almost as if they were made just for eavesdropping.

"Hello, can I help you?" asked Jessica. Then she gasped. "Phil!"

"Hey Jessica." a man's voice replied. It didn't sound as young as Jessica's voice. Maybe many years older.

"What brings you here?" asked Jessica.

"I was on my way to HQ and decided to stop by and say hi."

_HQ?_

"I heard it's been complete chaos over there for a while," said Jessica.

"Yes it has," he sighed. "And guess who's going to have to write reports on everything that has been happening?" he added.

Jessica laughed. "Sucks for you."

_Reports? Chaos? What the heck are they talking about?_

"How's Valerie?" asked the man.

"Great. A bit lazy about cleaning though," chuckled Jessica.

_How does he know me? Could it be Mr. Grandy? No, I'm pretty sure his first name is 'Mr.'... And that he still hates me for sneaking into his yard to get my soccer ball and killing his gnomes._

"Kids these days," said the man.

"Yep. They're pretty strange."

_I'm pretty strange? Says the person who collects porcelain dolls..._

"Well, off to pure chaos."

"Take care Phil. Tell everyone I say hi."

"Will do."

The door shut.

"Val, you can come out now!"

Valerie jumped. She's skilled when it comes to listening and has sharp hearing, but for some reason, she was the jumpiest out of her friends.

"Kay!"

She walked down the stairs and picked up the vacuum. "Who was that?" she asked casually.

"Friend from work."

_Pretty sure the clinic is reffered a clinic, not HQ..._

"Oh, okay."

"Is salad good for lunch later?" asked Jessica, changing the subject.

"Sure."

_She's lying._

Looks like it wasn't a typical Saturday morning after all...


	3. Soccer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> STILL 2K12, I DON'T HAVE THE HEART TO BETA MY INNOCENT DAYS

The rest of the week went by pretty quickly.

Valerie's schedule was sort of the same too. School, eat, play soccer, sleep.

So short, yet so simple...

She wouldn't change it for the world.

Her face was flushed, hair sticking to her forehead from sweat as she kicked off her cleats to enter the house. Her clothes were a little bit muddy, but she didn't mind. She played soccer with the neighbor's boys, both her age and equally intense with soccer. Some curls were sticking out with the humidity.

"Mom, can you make me a sandwich?" she asked, scrimmaging through the refrigerator for a water bottle.

She didn't notice the two SHIELD agents sitting next to Jessica in the kitchen table.

"Not now Val," said Jessica.

Valerie turned around, a bit surprised to see the two agents. Of course, they were wearing civilian clothes.

"Um..." Valerie pointed to the agents. "Who are they?"

"Old friends of mine," said Jessica.

Valerie frowned, a bit confused.

Then it hit her.

One of them was the same man from last week.

"Um..." Valerie looked down at her socks, unsure of what to do. She was the most daring of her friends, but right now, she was unsure what to do.

"Val, how about you go on ahead and get a ice pop? You were playing hard outside."

Valerie brightened. "Really?" she asked.

"Yeah."

"Thanks!" Valerie shut the refrigerator door shut and got the ice pop, blueberry flavor. It was her favorite after all.

* * *

_She has his eye color._

Inside the small kitchen, Maria Hill was watching Valerie play soccer outside. One thing that caught her attention right away was her attitude. She was competitive. But wasn't exactly graceful. [Her muddy clothes explained it all too well.] But then again, who doesn't get muddy in soccer?

Her hair was curly and tangled. But at the state Valerie was outside, she could tell she didn't really care.

She taunted, she kicked, she defended. She was playing it hardcore.

No matter how much she thought about it, she still couldn't believe Clint had a daughter. She has to give him props for keeping a secret as big as that for so long.

And he keeps them well hidden.

"How old is she?" asked Maria.

"She's turning seven in a few days," replied Jessica. "She's been really excited about her birthday. Not sure why though."

"What kid would not be excited about her birthday?" asked Phil.

"That is true," replied Jessica.

Maria thought about how the Director told her about Valerie. It was out of the blue almost. She was writing a few reports of the new recruit's progress and the Director called her into his office. Once the door was shut and locked, he told her the news;

"Barton has a six year old daughter."

He explained further details; why he was keeping the secret, who Valerie was, everything except the identity of the biological mother.

Maria knew that was a silent message to not ponder. When Fury tells her something he wants to know, he says it. So when he leaves out a detail, she knew not to ponder.

But that still couldn't stop her curiosity.

Who could be Valerie's mother? Another agent? A civilian? It wasn't Jessica for sure. Fury already told her that, and even Jessica herself confirmed it.

She could find out who Valerie's biological mother was. She could go to the bottom of this and find out who she was, where she lived, and why she kept it a secret. But she decided not to.

Clint and Maria didn't get along so well at first. Didn't look at each other eye to eye, not agreeing on some things, that sort of thing. But she had to admit; he was one of the best agents SHIELD has ever had.

An enemy had invaded SHIELD a few years back. Completely surrounded by smoke, she was blinded and a enemy almost shot her. Luckily, before they could shoot, Clint had shot an arrow and saved her.

Ever since then, they had a mutual understanding and she had respected him.

As much as the curioisty tempted her, she decided to not ponder.

"So, Fury let you in the secret," said Jessica.

"You could say," said Maria with a slight shrug.

"What led him to tell him to letting you in?" asked Jessica.

"I'm not sure," shrugged Maria. "Fury has his reasons," she added.

"Clint probably told him to tell you," shrugged Phil.

"Most likely," said Jessica, sipping from her coffee. "Is SHIELD still a complete chaotic mess?" she asked.

Both Maria and Phil sighed. "You have no idea..."

Jessica chuckled. "It's a miracle New York is still in one piece. Too many crazy things happen at once," she said, both sincere and unsurprised.

"Not even a native New Yorker and you know how to deal with this," said Phil with a small chuckle.

"Georgia all the way," grinned Jessica.

Maria chuckled. Jessica wasn't from New York, like many other agents. But she

Suddenly, Maria's phone began beeping loudly. It was the ringtone only used for 'you-better-get-over-here-now' calls.

And those calls meant business.

"Excuse me," Maria stood up and went outside into the backyard.

* * *

"What is it?" she answered.

_"It's time."_

"On my way."

* * *

Maria hung up and went inside.

"It's been great seeing you again, Jessica, but I have to go," Maria picked up her coat.

"That's cool. See you later Maria," waved Jessica.

In the other room, Valerie laid lazily, eating the ice pop and watching a re-run of Phineas and Ferb. She saw Maria walk across the room and to the door.

"Bye Valerie," waved Maria.

Valerie frowned. How did she know her name? But she waved back. "Bye...lady," she replied.

Maria smiled a little bit and left.

Valerie froze for a second.

What just happened?

After thinking about it for a little bit, she shrugged and continued watching Phineas and Ferb.


	4. Harlem

"Oh God."

Those were the two words Clint could say after staring at the news clipping on his desk.

_A strange creature wreaks havoc in Harlem._

Harlem.

The same city of Harlem that Valerie and Jessica went to visit every weekend.

Clint froze for a minute.

_Harlem._

Natasha was walking back from the small apartment kitchen, tired from a day of working at SHIELD.

"Clint?" asked Natasha.

"Oh God."

"Clint, what's wrong?" asked Natasha.

"Harlem, Nat. Harlem!" replied Clint.

"What about Harlem?" asked Natasha.

"Val and Jessica go to Harlem every weekend."

"Oh God."

There was a few seconds of silence before they both began searching for their phones.

"Where's my phone?" asked Clint.

"I'm already calling them," Natasha pulled out her phone and began dialing. "Jessica?"

"Nat!"

"Are you guys okay?" asked Natasha.

"Yes, we're okay. Val..."

"What about Valerie? Is she hurt?"

"We're both fine. She's just a bit...angry," replied Jessica.

Natasha frowned. "How?" she asked.

"That creature kinda wrecked her favorite soccer center. And Tony Stark's on the news."

Natasha walked over to the television set and turned it on. "I don't understan-oh."

_"Tony Stark only after months of confirming he is Iron Man announces to pay for damages done by the creature."_

On-screen, paparazzi were following Tony as he was entering a black car.

Natasha sighed in relief.

"Why is Valerie so angry about it?" she asked.

_"She hates Tony. He bought the field she always played soccer in for a new Station or something a few months back," said Jessica._

"Of course he would," mumbled Natasha.

_"Hm?" asked Jessica._

"Nothing. Are you home?" asked Natasha.

_"Yes."_

"And Val?"

_"Val's too busy fuming at the television," said Jessica with a chuckle._

"She'll get over it," shrugged Natasha.

_"She always does."_

"Yep."

_"Alright, I have to leave you. Oven's dinging," said Jessica._

"Alright, bye."

Natasha hung up and laid on the couch with a sigh of relief.

"Are they okay?" asked Clint, slightly panicked.

"Calm down Clint, they're both okay. They were on the other side of Harlem when that happened," said Natasha calmly.

"Far away from that thing, right?" asked Clint.

"Yes. Far away from it."

Clint sighed of relief. "Thank God," he whispered as he sat down in the arm chair.

Natasha sighed again, already beginning to fall asleep with the silence...

Until a sharp beep from Clint's pocket rang out.

"Hello?" he answered.

A few seconds of talking and he let out a silent groan.

"On my way."

He hung up.

"What is it?" asked Natasha.

"Guess who is needed at SHIELD to investigate this mess?"

Natasha couldn't help but hide her smirk as Clint mumbled to himself and began looking for his jacket.

"All I wanted was a cup of coffee..." he mumbled and slipped outside the door.


	5. Birthday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the fluffiest shit I have ever written what the fuck

Chapter Five: Birthday

* * *

_"Barton."_

"Yes sir?" asked Clint.

_"Agent Hill knows about it."_

It took a short while for Clint to understand what Nick meant.

_Maria knows about what?_

"Sir?" asked Clint.

_"She is aware of your situation."_

…

_Oh._

"Understood."

So now Maria was in the big secret...

It made sense for Maria to be aware. But still, Clint felt a little exposed. I mean, other than his relationship with Natasha, his biggest secret was Valerie. It . Possibly one of the most well kept secrets Clint has ever had. [After almost seven years]. She was Fury's right hand and she deserved to know.

"Anything else?" asked Clint.

_"No."_

"Alright."

Nick Fury hung up.

All SHIELD phone calls were recorded which is why Nick couldn't exactly tell Clint what he meant. That made sense.  
He watched the project going on down from his 'nest'. Well, it was a balcony, totally different. But the nickname was already settled among the researchers here, so what the hell?

He also noticed that the researchers called him Hawkeye, not Agent Barton. It makes sense, since it was his codename. Other than Selvig, he was surrounded by complete strangers. And until today, he didn't know what was going on.

Turns out a major power source knows as the Tesseract "The Cube'' was discovered buried in the ocean. One that was being wanted desperately in the World War 2. At first he didn't understand what was the big deal about it... Until he saw how much power it could have and how easily it could be used against the world.

Speaking of World War 2, he wondered how the 'man out of time' was doing. Must suck waking up after 70 years to see the entire world change.

He observed the activity going on beneath. People were talking, studying notes, writing notes, or fetching coffee. Coffee was a necessary thing here. Like, very necessary. [More like a rule...] They also had a packet of sugar with them everywhere. Sweet coffee tastes disgusting in his opinion. He liked his coffee decaf, strong and unsweet. Kept him awake during missions.

He looked at his watch, 9:49 PM. Still in New York time. Valerie would be asleep right now... Or watching a soccer game. Tomorrow is her birthday. He's gotta make it up for her somehow. Natasha wasn't able to make it. He did the math in his head and saw that also. It was almost as if Nick Fury was sending off to missions on purpose, just to see if they could cope being away from her.

Yeah, he was probably doing that. He still wasn't over having one of the best agents under house arrest for eight months.

He saw someone enter the area.

Maria Hill.

She spotted him across the area and nodded in greeting. He nodded back.

Clint and Maria didn't get along at first. Hell, they weren't even on speaking terms back then. But now, they held respect for each other. A respect Clint was still processing through his mind.

Behind her, he saw Nick Fury enter.

_Ok, this is just got serious._

If there was one thing Clint learned about Nick and Maria entering, it's that whatever was going on just got serious.

* * *

The next day

* * *

"Birthday girl!"

Valerie smiled as she saw Jessica approach her in a hug after school was over. All during the day, people were wishing her a happy birthday, hugging, pinning dollars onto her shirt or pinching her seven times on the shoulder. It was almost a tradition.

"Ready to go eat out?" asked Jessica.

"Yeah!"

They parked the car at the house and walked from the house to a nice outdoor restaraunt.

Valerie loved this place except for one thing.

It was right in front of Stark Industries.

"Mom, why?"

"Because the food is good."

"But why?!" she pointed to Stark Industries.

Jessica sighed. "Tony is not as bad as you think," she replied.

"He's worse," mumbled Valerie."Why does he exist?!"

"Honey, you can ask Howard Stark why Tony was born. Now eat."

Valerie sighed and looked down at her food. She doesn't know much about Tony to be honest. All she knows is that he's a billionaire and a playboy.

But if he was a billionaire, why did he choose to have a R&D Station on her soccer field?

"Oh hello there handsome!~" whistled Jessica.

Valerie looked up confused. Did her mother just call someone handsome?

"Mom?" asked Valerie confused.

"Look at him!" Jessica pointed to a man a few tables away from him. "Wow! I've never seen him around."

"Mom! Don't point!" Valerie exclaimed and pulled Jessica's arm down.

Jessica was pointing to a man sitting at a table a few yards away. He was looking up at the tower with curiosity. He wore a brown leather jacket and his hair was slicked back. Shirt tucked in, nice appearance, and such.

"I assume he's new here," said Jessica. "And he's kinda cute."

"Mom!"

"Okay honey, I'm done. Sorry, sorry."

"Quit staring at his butt."

"I'm not staring at him," said Jessica with a laugh.

Valerie rolled her eyes. "Whatever."

"Sassy mouth," Jessica lightly tapped Valerie's mouth.

"Hey!"

"Apologize."

"But you're sassy!"

"That's because I'm an adult and therefore I have the right to be sassy. Now shut up and eat your food. It's your birthday," Jessica pointed to Valerie's plate with her fork.

"Speaking of birthday, will Dad be able to come?" asked Valerie.

…

Jessica bit her lip. She was dreading this. "I'm sorry, honey. He got hung up on some business down in Florida..."

"And Nat?"

"Errands."

Valerie frowned and looked down at her plate.

"But hey, we're going to have the Gilberts over for dinner," said Jessica with a small smile.

Valerie bit a meatball.

"Honey, your dad will make it up for you. I promise. And you know about me and my promises..."

She looked up."You never break them."

"That's the spirit! Now..." Jessica pulled out her phone. "Smile for a pic?" she asked.

Valerie smiled. "Alright!"

"Say cheese!"


	6. The Blue Light

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now THIS is where lil me got it together and kicked it up a notch!

Loki walked right in front of Clint.

"You have heart."

He lifted the scepter to Clint's chest.

It was almost as if Loki could see his memories.

Of course Clint had heart. He had a kid. He was human. All humans had emotions. He didn't understand what he meant.

But then the blue light came into his brain.

It felt like a bee sting at first. Sharp and painful. Clint felt something literally shift into his brain. He could still see physically but he was no longer in control.

It was painful.

Soon the blue light had taken over his mind, except for one little part. The little part that  
witnessed everything but couldn't do anything about it.

"Sir, Director Fury is not cooperating." his own voice said out loud looking over at Loki.

The still sane part of his mind tried to retaliate, say no and to shoot an arrow straight  
through Loki's eyes. A voice that was certainly not his began bellowing.

Do you really want to risk the life of your daughter?

The voice was sly, manipulative. It was covered in vain and greed. The small part tried to locate the voice, but he couldn't do it.

Think about it, Clinton. Do you seriously want your two most precious people in the world to be hurt?

_What are you talking about?_

Natasha and Valerie. I know all about them Clinton. It would be quite a foolish move to hurt them.

_Don't you dare get near them._

Oh, I won't get near them. You will.

Clint was fighting with himself and the blue light. And he was losing.

_Whatever the hell you are, if you even dare get near my kid or girl and I will-_

You will what, Barton? Kill me? The voice laughed. Quite the father you are. Missing his own daughter's birthday. The day she was looking forward to the most to spend with her lie of a mother and pity of a father.

_Shut up._

Give up Clinton. It's no use anyway.

The blue light made Clint reload the gun and aim at Nick.

Because in the end, you'll always kneel.

* * *

"Mom, I'm going to a soccer game with Jack and Fred!" Valerie announced as she ran down the stairs.

Jessica was in the kitchen, sending the picture to Natasha and Clint. Clint wouldn't see the picture until he was done with the mission obviously, but at least it would be waiting for him.

"Is Mrs. Gilbert going to give you a lift back?" asked Jessica.

"Yeah!"

"Alright," Jessica put her phone down on the kitchen table and walked over to Valerie. "Go score some goals for me," she smiled and hugged her.

"I will," Valerie grinned.

"Bye kiddo. Love ya."

"Love you too!" Valerie waved and ran out the door.

Jessica sighed and began making dinner, knowing Valerie was going to be very hungry  
when she got home.

* * *

Half an hour later...

* * *

Jessica was half way done with the lettuce when she heard a small thud upstairs.

She stopped and looked up for a second. Was the AC screwing up again?

The thuds stopped. She shrugged and returned to making dinner.

Then the thuds continued but this time, they were going down the stairs.

That's when she got scared. She grasped the kitchen knife crept her way to the living room.

"Who's there?" she called out.

Three gunshots echoed in the house.

Jessica collapsed, gasping for air. Everything began failing at once. Her muscles, her limbs, her lungs. She couldn't fight anymore.

Her time was up.

So she closed her eyes and resigned.

* * *

"Thanks for the lift, Mrs. Gilbert!" Valerie waved at her neighbor and headed up to the door.

She was sweaty and tired, like after every soccer practice. Hair sticking out of her ponytail, grass stains on her yellow cleats and uniform, yep she was a mess.

But it wasn't a beauty pageant, so why bother?

As she neared the steps of her house, she felt something wasn't right.

Her house didn't have the welcoming feeling it always had whenever she got home. It wasn't emitting optimism like always.

She stopped on the steps and knocked on the door.

No answer.

With a small push, the door opened and she stepped in.

She didn't see this coming.

Jessica was on the floor, surrounded by a pool of her own blood. Three holes in her chest and a kitchen knife not a few inches next to her hand.

Unsure of to scream or cry, Valerie just ran up the stairs.


	7. Shatter

"I hate jetlag," mumbled Natasha as she flopped down onto her bed. She got her phone off of Airplane mode and tossed it onto her bed.

"Ding! Ding!"

Natasha looked over to her phone and saw it lighting up.

Incoming call: Jessica's House Phone.

Jessica had two phones; her cell phone and her house phone. The house phone was only used for emergencies.

Let's just say Natasha kind of flipped when she answered. "Hello?"

"Nat?" Valerie gulped.

"Valerie, what's wrong?"

_"Are you home?"_

"Yes. Speak up Val!"

_"I-I-I think my mom is dead..."_

What?

"What happened?"

_"I got home from soccer and..." Valerie was crying. "I saw her on the floor, bleeding. There's too much blood! I'm scared Nat! I'm scared!"_

"Just hang in there, Val. Just hang on," Natasha was already grabbing her keys and putting on her shoes. "Where are you?"

_"My room."_

"Okay, listen to me carefully. I want you to get a change of clothes. Don't wear your cleats. I'm taking you somewhere that's safe. Stay in your room and don't get out until I tell you to, Okay?" asked Natasha as she got into her car.

_"Okay."_

"Don't panic okay?"

_"I'm really scared Nat, I'm really scared."_

"Just think of your happy place. Think of something that makes you happy."

_"Soccer?"_

"Yes. Think about it for a little bit. Don't worry, I'm on my way."

* * *

Just as Natasha began dialing Phil, she received a phone call from him.

"Phil?"

_"Agent Romanoff?"_

"Yes."

_"Barton's been compromised."_

Natasha froze.

Compromised?

"Phil?" asked Natasha.

_"Yes?"_

"Jessica's dead."

Even when she said it, she couldn't believe it.

_"What?"_

"Val just called telling me Jess got shot."

_"Natasha... are you okay?"_

"No."

Natasha was trying really hard not to cry. Like, really hard. Her friend was dead. Her daughter was scarred and sobbing. The guy she loved was compromised.

Her life was falling apart.

_"Nat, just hang in there. I'll send some agents to the scene."_

Scene. He was already calling Jessica's death a crime scene.

"I'm picking Val up,"

_"Nat-"_

"I am not leaving her. She's coming with me," said Natasha.

_"Fury's not going to be happy."_

"As long as she's not in his way, she'll be alright. Phil, I can't leave her. I only trusted Jessica. Only her."

_"Are you sure about this?"_

"Yes."

The shell of neutrality and stoic was shattering and fading. The shell she had worked so hard on perfecting. But now, it was all gone.

_"I'll let you know when I send the agents. Tell me when you have Val out of sight."_

"Alright. Thank you, Phil."

"Hang in there Nat. I've got your back."

* * *

**Manipulation. That is all you need to break a human. Manipulate with his mind.**

Are you sure it will work?

**Yes. With the cube, you can manipulate him like a child. Look at his memories. Toy with them. At this rate, he is your puppet.**

Puppet?

**Toy with him.. Mold his memories as you like. They are under your control now.**

All of them?

**Yes. Toy with them as you like.**

Well... There is a certain portion of his memories it's very hard to acess.

**Which are...**

Memories of his loved ones. I have only glimpsed a few of them. He has kept them well hidden.

**You haven't seen the full power the Tesseract can do to a mortal mind. Use it at your advantage.**

Mine?

**Yes, Loki. Use it.**

* * *

Clint flinched internally. It felt awful being toyed with. It was almost as if he could physically feel his mind being toyed around with like a box of toys.

You have heart, Clinton.

_Why are you toying with my mind?_

You have a daughter?

_Don't change the subject._

I see all the memories you have of her are kind ones.

He absolutely hated when the enemy didn't speak to him straight forward.

You had a troubled childhood.

_Does that mean anything you pompous asshole?_

I can inflict very uncomfortable memories on you Clinton.

Clint winced and felt his mind literally shift to another place. He wanted to fight. He wanted to escape. But he couldn't.

_I swear to God, if you get near my daughter or Natasha..._

I see you and Natasha have quite a bond.

_Don't get near my family._

You kill for a living Barton.

_That was in the past._

You can't let go of the past. Ever. Once I'm finished bring this pity planet to my control, you won't need to forget the past. In fact, you can bring it back.

_Never. I know you're toying with me, Loki. God of mischief... More like god of bullshit._

No need to be witty with me, Clinton. Who's the one in control of your mind and body right now?.

...

I thought so. You are my marionette, Accept it.

Clint sighed. His mind was being toyed with. Hell, his entire life was being toyed with. The thought of Natasha and Valerie safe and together was the only thing that comforted him. The three just sitting down, eating or laughing.

He's gotta get through this. For Natasha and Valerie.

But at the same time, he was losing hope.

He was a puppet on a string.

Only the puppeteer could control the puppet.

And the odds are quite literally stacked against you when the puppeteer is the Norse god of mischief.

* * *

The usual ten minute ride from Natasha's apartment took three minutes.

She lost track of how many traffic laws she most likely broke, but it didn't matter. She needed to get to Valerie, ASAP.

Once she arrived, she quickly checked for any agents. When she saw none, she stepped in.

And almost screamed.

Her friend, her former partner, the guardian of her daughter was dead.

She has seen blood before. And dead bodies also. Over the years, she has never batted an eye.

But now, she was on the verge of crying.

She walked slowly over to Jessica and choked back a sob.

"Thank you... for everything." A tear rolled down Natasha's cheek. "Thank you so much."

She touched Jessica;s forehead lightly and began darting up the stairs.

"Val?" she knocked on Valerie's door.

"Nat?"

"I'm here honey. Open the door."

Valerie opened the door and literally hugged/tackled Natasha.

"Shhh, it's okay."

"She's dead! I can't believe this!" cried Valerie.

"Come on."

Valerie stood up, She had changed out of her muddy/grass stained clothes into more comfortable and wiped her eyes.

"You're going to be okay. We're going to be okay," Natasha wiped stray tears from Valerie's face. "Come on."

"Where are we going?"

"Somewhere safe."


	8. Cover your eyes

"Now what?" asked Valerie. ****  
  
"Okay, we're going downstairs and to my car."

"I don't want to see," said Valerie with a small whimper.

"Just cover your eyes and don't look back. It won't be long."

Natasha got the small backpack that was dumped on the floor.

"You go first," said Valerie pointing to the stairs.

"Alright," Natasha began walking down the stairs. "Cover your eyes Val. It'll be quick."

"I'm scared!"

Natasha stopped and walked back up the stairs.

"Okay, I'm going to carry you. Just cover your eyes."

She bent down and picked Valerie up.

It hit her.

She hasn't carried her in over two years.

She hasn't carried her own daughter for a long time until now.

"It's going to be quick."

She carried Valerie down, one arm with her bag.

She glimpsed at Jessica and bit her lip.

_Thank you for everything._

* * *

"Val, are you okay back there?" asked Natasha as she sat down and pulled her seat belt on.

"No," replied Valerie with a sniffle in the backseat.

"Just hang in there, Val."

Once they were on the road, Valerie began to fall asleep.

It had been a bad habit of hers. Falling asleep in the car only minutes after being on the road. It was almost as if the car lulled her to sleep.

She struggled to stay awake, but in the end she fell asleep.

Once she was asleep, Natasha pulled over and dialed Phil.

_"Natasha?"_

"Okay, we're out."

_"Thank you... How is she?"_

"At the moment, she's asleep. But she's still upset," said Natasha.

_"Are you still thinking about it?"_

"I have no other choice, Phil. I'm not leaving her alone with someone I don't know."

_"You know..."_

Natasha chuckled. "I'm not taking her all the way to Portland with your cellist."

_"I tried," chuckled Phil. "But Fury is going to be angry."_

"I know. I just hope he's in a tolerable mood today."

* * *

"No."

_So much for a tolerable mood._

"Director Fury-"

"A seven year old on a helicarrier? Romanoff, what on earth were you thinking?"

"Director, she has her reasons," said Phil, standing next to her.

"Why isn't she with her legal guardian?" asked Nick.

"Her guardian is a victim of a robbery. She's been murdered."

"When did this happen?"

"This afternoon."

"And where's the kid?"

"She's asleep over there."

"Listen Romanoff, that kid steps in the way and you'll pay the consequences. Understood?"

"Yes sir."

Nick Fury left.

* * *

It was silent for a few moments.

Natasha was sitting in the backseat next to Valerie and Phil sat in the passenger's seat.

"She has Clint's eyes," said Clint looking at the background of Valerie on Natasha's phone.

"He still won't admit it," Natasha smiled a bit. She pushed a bit of Valerie's hair aside.

"We will bring him back," said Phil.

"I'm worried on what Loki will do to him," said Natasha. "He's heartless."

"Clint is strong. He can handle Loki. Trust me," Phil comforted.

"About Jess... How did you know it was a robbery?" asked Natasha.

"When we sent the investigation group, all electronic appliances in her living room were missing. Her phone was in the kitchen," Phil pulled out a phone with a pale blue case. "I thought you might want to keep it."

Natasha got the phone and unlocked it.

There was a notification on the screen.

Outbox failed: Update.

_"Val's b-day was today. Had some lunch in Marty's. Fun~ She wasn't too happy with the restaurant being right in front of Stark Tower though. (Soccer Field thing, still not over it.) We had dinner with the Gilberts. Surprisingly, she didn't play soccer. It wasn't the same without you or Clint. But it's okay, I understand. Here's a pic of b-day gal Val. [Hush, I'll still make rhymes. Admit it, you love them!~"_

A picture of a smiling Valerie was in the message.

_"wishing you the best, xo Jess."_

"Natasha?"

"Her last update."

"Are you alright?" asked Phil.

"Excuse me." Natasha wiped her face again. "We'll be landing in half an hour, right?" she asked.

"Yes. Might as well wake her up."

"Alright."

Jessica's last update. The update that never made it. Natasha put the phone in her bag and zipped it shut.

It was all too soon.

Jessica's death.

Clint.

The Tesseract.

And Loki.

He was a threat bigger than anything she has ever faced before. Not only that, he had the most powerful weapon anyone in SHIELD has seen.

The Captain was correct.

_"You should have left it in the ocean."_

* * *

"Val, wake up," Natasha nudged Valerie gently.

"What?" Valerie yawned.

"We're here."

"Oh."

"Come on," said Natasha. "Let's go."

Valerie stood up and followed. "Um Nat? Where are we going?" asked Valerie.

"Well, we're going to the Helicarrier."

Valerie stopped. "The what?"

Oh right. She has absolutely no idea what's going on.

Natasha sighed. "How about I explain it to you later?" she asked.

"Okay," shrugged Valerie.

"Another thing; if you see a man with an eyepatch, get out of his way,"

Valerie frowned.

_This is getting really weird..._

She shrugged to herself and continued walking.


	9. Foreign

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am very aware this is unrealistic and they would never allow a child on the Helicarrier, but my younger self didn't think of that as she was kickin ass writing this, so on behalf of my younger self, this is an AU so livin la vida loca it is.

It was foreign.

Everything was foreign.

Valerie looked around a little nervously around in the top of the hellicarrier.

How did she go from playing soccer in the backyard to a _helicarrier_?

It had all happened so fast. She had gotten home, seen...that, called Natasha and now they were on a helicopter pad.

She followed Natasha closely, making sure to stay out of the way like she was told to.

Everything was so weird.

 _Everything_.

With Natasha, how she was was handling the fact that the Avengers were going to be on board and Valerie was with her was still a mystery.

"What about my dad?" she asked.

"What do you mean?" asked Natasha.

"I didn't call him. He doesn't know about...that."

It took Natasha a few seconds to comprehend that Valerie meant Jessica.

"Oh." was all Natasha could say. "Oh okay..."

"Where is he?" asked Valerie. "My mom said that he was busy in Florida, but he hasn't called."

_Florida._

Always used the Florida card.

Natasha bit her lip. "I will explain everything later."

"Everything?" Valerie asked, slightly unconvinced.

"Everything."

_Except that I'm her biological mother._

Natasha can't let her know this soon. God no. Especially only hours after Jessica has been murdered. That would just be horrible and insensitive.

"Who's the old guy with the sun glasses?" asked Valerie pointing to Phil standing in the back of the landing pad.

"Oh, that's Phil."

Phil.

That was the same man from last time.

Exact same man.

"Oh... Oh my gosh..."

"Val?" asked Natasha.

"He went to visit my mom, twice!" Valerie exclaimed. "I saw him! How?!"

Well, this was unexpected.

Sometimes when Natasha wasn't in town, Phil would check on them. He insisted. It was the least he could do.

"Oh... He knew her. Old friend."

"...Of what?" asked Valerie.

Now she was getting suspicious.

"I'll explain everything later," repeated Natasha.

"Including who that guys is?" asked Valerie, pointing to Phil with her thumb..

"Yes."

"Okay."

_Uhhh, okay? NOT OKAY! Who is he? Why is he here? What is going on?!_

Valerie's thoughts were hectic. Everything was happening way too fast.

"And what about my dad?" asked Valerie. "What are you going to tell him?"

"I'll answer everything later," sighed Natasha.

"Alright, alright," Valerie backed off a few steps. When Natasha had that tone, or sigh, she was getting impatient. And that was never good.

But she still couldn't believe everything was happening...

Her mom was dead. She couldn't call her dad. Well, more like she couldn't reach her dad.

And then there was Phil.

She didn't know who he is. Or how he knew her mom.

Then there was this thing called a Helicarrier.

What is that? Why does it have such a weird name?

_And if it was a helicopter, why was it on the sea?!_

Then there was the most troubling question of them all...

_What's going on?_

She tugged onto a curl, unsure of what exactly was going on around her.

The Helicarrier on the outside, in her opinion, looked like a very large parking lot on the ocean. There was people talking and walking around rapidly. All adults and with navy blue tight suits. Some had guns and others didn't.

"Val, follow me," motioned Natasha as she began walking inside the Helicarrier.

Valerie looked up, still tugging on her hair and followed.

If she thought that the outside of the Helicarrier was strange, she was very wrong.

She had not seen the inside.

_Whoa._

Valerie looked around in awe.

_This is so...wow._

"It'll take awhile to take in," commented Natasha.

"Whoa."

"Agent Romanoff," Nick spoke with a clearing of his throat.

"Stand back," whispered Natasha to Valerie.

Valerie scooted back and stayed near the wall.

"Director," nodded Natasha.

"Do you remember what we spoke about?" asked Nick.

"Yes sir."

"Good." He turned around and started heading to the front of the bridge.

"Val?" asked Natasha.

"Can I sit down somewhere?" asked Valerie with a little squeak, still taking everything in.

Oh dear, she's shocked.

"Yes. Let's go."

Each Avenger had their own small room in the Helicarrier. It wasn't really fancy, just a bed, dresser and a bathroom. Seeing that Valerie was not expected, or an Avenger, Natasha led her to her room. With everything going on, she isn't going to sleep much anyways.

Then it hit her.

Valerie.

On the Helicarrier.

With the Avengers.

_With the Avengers._

"Tasha, are you okay?" she asked, noticing the pale expression on Natasha's face.

"I'm okay." Natasha gulped.

_Not okay._

Great.

Just great.

She has even more to deal with than she bargained for.


	10. Shock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now THIS is where it gets better

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now this is the start of the 2k15 updates. Written after Age of Ultron, because I recognize the council has made a decision.
> 
> But given that it is a stupid ass decision, ive elected to ignore it. 
> 
> Fuck you Joss, I had this shit done since 2k12. Valerie is my literal child and according to MCU canon, she should not exist. I say fuck that. AU all the way motherfucker!

**You have a child.**

For a while, the voice didn't show up. Probably shifting through his memories, looking for something to pull against him.

What is it to you?

**You're a father.**

Yeah. And?

**My, my, my. The one who takes life is responsible for giving one. You've got oceans of blood on your hands, blood you've taken willingly. For money. You were a gun for hire.**

Why does it matter now?

Clint had his demons. He killed in the past, and Loki was right about the amount of blood on his hands. So many targets, men taken out in battles, in assignments. He knew the darkest pits of reality could bring. The scum of men, with corruption and malice in every nook and cranny there was.

But it doesn't define who he is.

His past as a hired gun was what it was: his past. He knew it was wrong, he knew it was bad. But it doesn't define who he is now. Clint Barton, Hawkeye. Top SHIELD agent, part of the best of the bestest. With friends and family by choice. With a beautiful daughter that loved soccer and was the sun of his life. With a beautiful girlfriend that loved him back.

**I can bend you to do anything as I will. I can order you to kill your family. One by one, cut off every limb. First, your lover. And then, your daughter. So she can watch you for the monster you really are. Watch her father be at his most truth and honest form; being the deliverer of death.**

SHUT UP!

**Follow my orders. Steal the iridium. You are my puppet. I am your God, your ruler. And remember. You will always kneel.**

* * *

The world had changed too much.

It was still taking time for all to settle in. Seventy years. The war was over. Everything had moved on, progressed, changed. The Commandos were dead, Peggy was dying, Howard Stark was killed in a car accident. Bucky was gone, and the war still felt fresh and constant in his mind.

Steve Rogers sighed, running a hand through his hair. He was wearing the suit that Phil Coulson had shown him. It felt odd, but he missed his old one.

"Agent Romanoff," he said.

"It's Natasha. What is it?"

"Are you in charge of the little girl?"

"Yes," Natasha said.

"Do they really start off that young?" Steve asked.

"It's really hard to explain. And no, she's not a spy."

After what she been through, like hell she will let Valerie become a spy. It was why she had to lock away the secrecy in the darkest of shadows. For it to remain off the records and notes that

God. She was a mother.

Seeing that Steve was not going to budge, Natasha sighed. "Fine then, walk with me."

"Since you're going to eventually hear about it, the little girl's name is Valerie Frost. She's a daughter of a former agent, Jessica Frost. She died yesterday from an armed robbery before I got here."

"And her father?"

"He's compromised."

It took Steve a few moments to understand what she meant. Compromised. Compromised. Something he's been hearing over and over since he had been on board. Then it hit him. "Wait...Hawkeye? That's his kid?"

"Yeah. Clint has many enemies, some that will go as low as to harm a child, so he kept it off the records. Only Fury, Coulson, Hill and I know. And well, you," Natasha rubbed her temples. "To the world, he's Clint Hart. Divorced, big wig attorney. It has been working for years. We didn't think anything was going to happen." Natasha sighed. "Stupid of me."

"It isn't. Too much has been happening and it didn't give you enough time to process it." Steve would know. He was living it.

"Jessica...she was communications and advanced technical support. The enemies she had were viruses and firewalls, and she took those down with ease. She didn't have anyone with a vendetta against her."

"Do the agents know about Jessica's death?"

"Yes. Current or former agents dying isn't common, but it isn't new either. They know she retired to raise her child and that she was a doctor in a Manhattan clinic. But she didn't have enemies. Coulson launched an investigation and headquarters is taking care of it."

"She...she saw her. Her body. A bloody mess."

"That's awful."

"Can I talk to her?" Steve asked. "I know a thing or two about loss. Maybe keep her company for a little while. You look like you need a break."

"Captain, we're in an international crisis search for Loki."

"I can spare five minutes."

"Fine. Just...she doesn't know. Not yet."

* * *

Valerie couldn't sleep anymore.

Right now, she was sitting on a metal bridge in a fortress in the sky. Thousands of feet off the ground. She was waiting for Natasha. Left alone, she was drawing on a napkin

She wanted her mother. She wanted her father. She wanted to be home, watching television with her mom. Making lunch with her mom. Laughing with her mom, playing soccer with her mom.

God, she can't be dead. It's not possible for her to be dead.

But she is. Valerie saw the blood. So much of it. Her mother was dead, and who knows where her father was. She didn't know where she was, maybe not even in New York anymore.

What she did know was that she was alone, her mother gone, and she was on a fortress thousands of feet in the sky. It was terrifying.

She wiped her tears with the back of her hand. God, not even a day ago, she was playing soccer. She was rolling on the grass, laughing as her mom tickled her and filmed it with her phone. Not even a week ago, she was coming home from school and waiting for her mom to make her a sandwich and telling her how her day went. Not even three weeks ago, she was in class, reading about erosion.

How was all of this possible?

This was all too much.

And her mom. Her bright smiles, her understanding personality. There was no one like her. She could never be replaced. But what can she do? What can she do? She is only a child. No one is going to take her to school anymore. Who's going to tell her teacher that her mother was dead?

Where was her father?

She needed someone. She needed her dad. She needed her mom. She needed everything to be back to normal, without all the tragedy and all the pain she felt. All the fear.

What about the nurses that her mom worked with? Karen? Lorenzo? Patrick? They were all really nice to her when she went to the clinic after school sometimes. Her backpack was full of stickers they'd give her every time she visited. She would stick them everywhere; Natasha's phone, the side of the television, the inside of her closet door with colorful sticky notes and pictures of her dad's travels. Even on her mom's face and she'd proudly wear the smiling sunshine on her cheek.

That was, on the condition that Valerie wore one too.

Valerie sniffled, wiping at her eyes.

"Are you okay?"

The same man on the bridge was standing not too far from her. From her spot on the ground, he was tall. Too tall.

"Oh my god," Valerie gasped. "I know you!"

"I've been told." He wouldn't be surprised if she learned about him in school. They learned young about Captain America, especially in elementary school. He was the first superhero. And now even more, that he was out of the ice and back on the world again.

"You were at Marty's!" she exclaimed.

Oh, well that was a surprise.

"I was?"

"Yeah! On my birthday!" she stopped. "My mom said you had a cute butt."

This time, Steve let out a short laugh. Not laughing at her, but amused. The comment was so unexpected, but under the current circumstances, it felt good. Seeing Valerie's expression of alarm, like she had said the wrong thing, Steve smiled and said "I've also been told. My name is Steve Rogers."

Her hand was so tiny compared to his, it was precious. He hadn't been around children in a long, long time. "Valerie Frost," she said.

"I heard about your mother," Steve said softly. "I'm sorry for your loss."

"Why did it have to be her?"

"I know how you feel, kiddo," Steve sighed. "I lost my mom too."

"Really?"

"Yeah. She got sick. I was devastated," he said. "My dad had passed during the war, and I didn't really have anyone."

"I'm sorry," Valerie said, sympathetic.

"I appreciate it. It took time, but I went with my best friend, Bucky. Times were different back then," he said. Way back then. "He helped me a lot. His family was really nice."

"Who was it?"

"Bucky. He had been my best friend since I could remember. That's the sad thing about loss. But I mean...People care for you. So in a way, you

"Did you love him?"

"Yeah. I did." Unaware that Valerie meant romantically, he caught himself. Shit. Shitshitshit... "Uh." She wasn't wrong.

"It's okay. My friend Jacob has two daddies and they're really nice. They made brownies for our playoffs." Soccer. Right. She was a soccer player.

Uphe shrugged. "What? Love is love," she said.

Steve's expression softened and he felt a slight relief. "Thank you."

"It's okay, I won't tell," she smiled.

He looked over to the drawing she had on a napkin, a short pencil in hand. "What are you drawing?"

"I don't know. It's supposed to be a dog but it looks bad."

Surely enough, the dog was misshaped with uneven ears.

"It can be fixed," Steve suggested. "May I?"

Valerie handed him the pencil and watched him draw, giving the fur more detail and a collar. The dog was smiling, his tail in the air.

"How can you do it?!" Valerie explained in awe.

"I always doodled when I was in the army."

"This is so cool!" Valerie clutched the napkin tightly. "Can you teach me how to draw when all of this is over?"

"Of course."

"Hey Val," Natasha greeted.

Natasha squeezed Steve's shoulder and whispered, "Thank you."

"Hey sweetie, done with the shower?"

"Yeah. Can you braid my hair?"

Whenever Natasha came over, Valerie would have her braid her hair. It was always a fun activity and Natasha knew how to untangle her curls, even with her hair dry. Jessica would get frustrated and give up, grabbing a flat iron and going from there.

Braiding was their thing. French braids, fish tail, making it look like a princess, she loved it.

Natasha sat down on the bunk bed brought Valerie onto her lap, starting to brush her still wet hair and already seeing the curls form up. She already knew where her tender spots were and how she usually wanted it.

"Tasha, what's going on? Where's my dad?"

"Honey, I haven't been entirely honest with you."

"SHIELD is an intelligence agency. We're secret agents, like in the movies. Before the clinic, your mother was a SHIELD agent, part of the technology and communications division. She retired to raise you. And your dad isn't an attorney."

"What do you mean?"

"His name is Clinton Francis Barton, not Clint Hart. He's an agent of SHIELD, like me. All the work trips haven't been vacations. He has missions around the world, like me. Right now, there's a very bad man on the loose. His name is Loki and he has a scepter and wants to bring an alien army to rule the world. He has your father."

"What?!" Valerie exclaimed. Then she remembered hearing the conversation between agents about agents being part of the bad side, with Loki. A manhunt.

"You're hunting my dad?!"

"No! God no, of course not. Loki used mind control on him."

"Why didn't mommy tell me?" Valerie asked. "Why did you lie?"

"Valerie, the world can be dangerous. There are people, too many people, that jump at the opportunity to make others suffer. We don't want it to happen to you. We didn't want to lie to you, my sweet girl. But all of this, it was for your protection, for your safety. Nothing hurts me more than seeing you sad. Everything will work out."

"But why did my mom have to die because of me?"

"No, no, she didn't die because of you. Her death was the terrible consequence of being at the wrong place at the wrong time."

"Will my daddy be okay?" Valerie choked up.

"Your dad is a strong man. He will be okay. I'm sure of it."

"Do you think he'll get me a puppy?"

"I'm not sure about that."

There was the crackle of a radio and Natasha was alert. She put one hand to her ear and said, "Agent Romanoff, reporting. On my way."

She turned to Valerie, holding her by her elbows. "Valerie, I gotta go. We have a lead on Loki. If you need anything, go to Coulson, okay?"

"Okay. Be careful."

"Of course," Natasha pulled her in for a quick hug and kissed her forehead. She fixed her braid to go down the side and left in a hurry, jogging out the door.


	11. Gods Among Children

It was October when Clint had last spent the week.

"Jesus, she's getting so big," Clint said. "Soon, I wont be able to carry her."

Valerie had fallen asleep after doing homework with him. She always insisted on doing it with him when she had the chance, even though he knew she understood it really well. Valerie was smart, but he figured she liked the company.

"Please, don't give me that bullshit," Jessica scoffed. "You have the strength of an Olympic athlete. I think you can handle a six year old."

Jessica was one of the most light hearted agents in SHIELD. She had the brightest, blondest hair of all, beating Sharon Carter herself. Matched her outgoing, too bright personality. An optimist, but at the same time, every hacker's nightmare. She wouldn't hesitate to downright roast a person who was rude to her. She could _ruin_ people's lives with the right tools, files and convenient video editing.

While Jessica Frost was the sun brightening the day, she was also the fire that could burn down the city into the night.

"Kindness does not equal weakness; the same hand that bandaged you sick can be the one that also chokes you," Jessica said. A flair for the dramatic, that Jessica Frost.

But knowing her, she probably meant choking someone's bank account to the point the poor bastard can't look at a dollar bill without crying. She fought evil in her own nonviolent way.

"Why is she so into soccer?" Clint asked. "Why not archery?"

"She just loves it, you know. Always has, since she was a baby."

"Want some coffee?"

"Of course. Let me just get her into her room."

Clint stood up, carrying Valerie and going up the stairs to her bedroom. Even though she was sound asleep, she unconsciously wrapped her arms around Clint's neck, getting more comfortable.

"Daddy?" Valerie mumbled.

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"I love you too, goodnight," he kissed her forehead and tucked her in, easily falling back to sleep.

It ached not being in a safe enough situation at times to even have a family to come home to each day. He was gone for weeks, maybe months, for missions, and he survived on coffee and sleep.

Even though it was stressful, he remembered each night why he did it. To make the world a safe place. For his little girl.

It wasn't often when he visited, but when he did, he made sure to make it last. The longest he had stayed was for a month during the summer. Valerie was five at the time. She loved it.

It was the best month of his life.

He lived through a few of her milestones. Her first tooth falling. (He woke up to Valerie screaming the next day about how the tooth fairy left her a silver dollar coin.) Her first little league semifinal game. Even though her team had lost, she moped for a while, but got back to her high spirits afterwards. She got that from Jessica: she was happy she made it this far and next time, they would go even farther.

And, like Clint had promised, he took her to her first professional soccer game, during which she got to experience her first funnel cake.

Yeah, a hyper Valerie on a sugar rush was also a first time for Clint.

She couldn't stop smiling for days. She went swimming, and she alwa

But the best of all was when Natasha arrived unexpectedly one morning and Valerie was so damn happy, her joy was contagious. Nothing felt wrong. Nothing felt off. His little family was complete. Natasha, Valerie, Jessica. The love of his life, his little girl and the most trustworthy friend he had met in years.

It was great.

The little moments counted too. Two warm mugs of coffee on a quiet weeknight. A calm, suburban neighborhood with clean lawns and anti-noisy neighbors. It was peaceful, much more peaceful than Clint's had been when he was younger.

At least he was able to do that. Provide a safe, secure home for his little girl, with no drinking or drugs around. A positive environment to give Valerie a better shot at life than he had at her age.

He knew he was going to do it do the best of his abilities.

After all, he never missed.

"Just because you had bad experience with some folk, it doesn't mean that all the apples are rotten," Jessica smiled. "She loves you unconditionally. You're her dad, and while all of this is real complicated, being a parent is something that can't be taken away."

"Have you dated anyone?" Clint asked.

Jessica let out a short laugh. "That's funny."

"Come on, you can get a great partner," Clint said. "Girlfriend or boyfriend, whoever it is, they're stupid to not fall for you."

"To the world, I am a single soccer mom. Not the young and sexy tech support I was at SHIELD. I work as a _nurse_ in a clinic, Clint. It's not easy to date. I devote all my time to Val, little league," Jessica sighed. "It's not easy for a single mom to get a good date nowadays."

"Natasha can hook you up," Clint suggested. Jessica rolled her eyes. "You need your alone time too," Clint said. "You're doing so much, you need a break."

"I know," Jessica sighed. "God, Clint, it's so stressful," she said. "I love it, I love her so much, even though she's not my daughter, but it's so stressful. I'm not her mother. Even if I could, I couldn't."

Clint knew why.

Before SHIELD, Jessica had gotten into a terrible car accident. She was going to be an active agent, passing all the tests and efficient in hand to hand combat. Hip injury, but even worse, internal damage.

Unable to bear children.

She was reserved to desk duty, so to speak. But that meant hacking.

"Jessica, listen to me. You are as much of a mother as Natasha is. You work each day to raise her and take care of her. I will always be grateful for you in our lives, and Natasha is too. Even though I stopped believing a long time ago, you are a blessing. We trust you completely with the most important person in our lives."

Jessica nodded, crying. She wiped her cheeks with her hand and felt Clint pull her in for a hug.

"Thank you," she said. "Thank you so much."

"You're her mother too. Never forget that."

* * *

The memories faded.

Dark.

Darkness.

Fragments only remained. It was painful. The image of Valerie bleeding. The image of Valerie screaming.

Clint couldn't control it.

"Daddy, why did you lie to me?"

"Daddy, why did you kill me?"

"Daddy, don't kill me! Please!" More screaming. More crying. "Daddy, I love you, please don't hurt me!"

The harsh words felt like he was being choked by air.

Fuck, he didn't hurt Valerie. He didn't hurt her. Not her, no, no, no. The blood on his arrow wasn't hers. It couldn't have been hers. She was safe with Jessica and finishing up her school year. She wasn't in whatever country they were in right now. She wasn't screaming.

No.

Not her.

Not his little girl.

He felt as if he turned around, Valerie would be standing right there. Crying.

**I can make this nightmare into a reality.**

_You stay the FUCK away from her._

**I won't be near her. You will.**

He knew why Loki was doing this. It was to make him weak, to be vulnerable with his emotions. He was a sadistic bastard.

Loki made it personal.

Once he got it together and out of his control, he's going to shoot two arrows in each of Loki's eyes. And he won't feel a single ounce of remorse for him.

* * *

They had Loki in custody.

It had felt too easy.

Something was off, Steve knew that for sure. It felt too easy. Loki was a god, a Norse god at that. Of mischief. This was too easy and he didn't feel too sure that they had the upperhand now.

It had been the advice he had followed for years, told by Bucky. "Now you listen here Stevie, there is no such thing as coincidences," he had said. "Things happen for a reason. Everything has a reason. Good or bad."

The advice had prevailed along his instincts during the war and even now.

Tony Stark had come on board too. He was cocky, arrogant but at the same time, blunt. He knew something was off. It shook Steve up to see just how much he looked like Howard.

On the bridge, Valerie was sitting around the table, entertaining herself with a legal pad and pens. A water bottle was half full next to her, along with wrappers of granola bars. Drawing whatever came to mind. Like she had promised, she stayed out of the way and to herself.

She watched Maria give commands to the agents and do her job. She had a nice voice. Like her teacher, strict but still approachable.

Another voice came into the picture.

She recognized that voice.

The voice of a man, a famous man, the one that stole her soccer field.

Tony Stark.

"You!" Valerie called out. "You destroyed my soccer field!"

"An agent?" Tony asked Maria. Maria shook her head. "A mini agent?"

"Hawkeye's daughter," Maria replied.

"Ah."

The cover that Natasha was using for Valerie if other agents asked was that Jessica Frost qualified for complete protection by SHIELD in case of an emergency, and it also applied to her daughter.

"Kid, I got honestly no idea what field you're talking about. When did it even happen?" Tony asked.

"Two years ago," Valerie said. "You never forget."

"In that case, that went down when another guy was running the company, not me. So on his behalf, I'm sorry."

Valerie crossed her arms, frowning. Trying to be intimidating, but failing. She glared at him for a while, trying to think of a retort. Natasha send her a glare. Finally, Valerie sighed. "Okay. Fineeeeeeee. I accept your apology," Valerie said.

"Great." Tony looked to a confused Maria. "What? I'd like one less pissed off person at me on board."

"Whatever you say."

* * *

"...Did you just throw a blueberry at me?"

"Raspberry."

"Same thing."

"No, it's totally different."

"How?"

"They're two different fruits," Valerie said. "One is...not blue." She looked a Bruce. "Bruce, you know science, help me!"

Bruce was trying not to laugh. "Not that kind of science, sorry."

"Their shapes are different, one has more bumps, the other is a little ball," Valerie frowned. "I'm just hungry," she said.

Tony handed her the rest of the blueberry bag.

"Oh no, you don't have to."

"Kid, I want to."

"Okay," Valerie grabbed Tony's hand and poured half of the blueberries. "We'll share."

This damn kid, thought Tony. This kid is too good for this world.

"Thanks kid."

"It's Valerie. And you're welcome," she bit a berry, and mumbled "Still owe me that field though."

"I heard that."

Valerie giggled and ate the berries.

* * *

Clint led the group onto the stolen plane. He prepared and loaded up his quiver. Look was gone, but the control wasn't.

The blue light remained. The blue light had replaced the space he had in his mind and constantly suffocated his memories. Picking and pulling apart. The precious and the worst. Missions gone terribly wrong. Natasha bleeding before she went into labor and crying in fear that she was going to lose her child. Jessica not surviving the car crash. Barney, his bastard asshole brother, really sending that arrow down deep into his bones and killing him.

Death.

No, no, _no._ He couldn't give in. He couldn't crack. He had control. He had something. He was better than Loki.

**You and I are the same, Barton. Quit fighting.**

Clint felt a sharp, stinging pain at the back of his skull. He winced, but he knew it was notphysical. It was the blue light. It was Loki.

**And kneel.**

* * *

Valerie laid her head on the table and sighed. She listened to the conversations around her, not knowing what they meant or what they were saying. Her head hurt.

Slowly, her eyes drifted closed to the sound of computers and keys being tapped away.

"Annnnnd she's out," Tony remarked.

"I'll take her," Steve said. He looked to Natasha and she nodded. Steve lifted Valerie with ease and carried her back to the room.

"So why are we babysitting?" Tony turned to Natasha.

"Her mother is a former SHIELD agent who got killed. She has the protection of SHIELD."

"Funny, isn't her mother standing right here?" Tony asked.

"What, you think I'm blind? She looks just like you. So you and Hawkeye got hitched," Tony shrugged. "I don't mind, I don't care. What we need to do is get what this lunatic is planning."

"Tony, I worked for you. I can handle one guy with a God complex."

"But here's the thing: he's actually a god."

"Of mischief. Watch and learn, Stark."

"After you, Natashalie."

Rolling her eyes at the nickname, Natasha walked down the halls, keeping a clear head. She knew what she was doing. She knew Valerie was safe, asleep in the room.

She had the cat in the bag.

"Not many can sneak up on me." Loki said.

"I'm not like many."

It was a dangerous game of cat against cat. One a spy, cunning and observant, another a god, mischievous and manipulative.

"I'm here about one of the agents. Clint Barton."

"Is this love, Agent Romanoff?"

"Love is for children," Natasha. "I owe him a debt."

Loki clicked his tongue. "Ah, children. I am aware. You possess familial love for your child. A proud, unheard mother." He began walking around the cell. "You say you love your child, a child that sees you only as a friend. Why? Oh right, because your cowardice has led to her living a lie. To the myth of family she had, with an absent father and false mother. You are nothing but a lie."

Natasha sat down on the bench. "Oh? Am I?" she asked.

"I know about Sao Paolo. The burning hospital. The amount of blood on your hands and still you lie to the world about who you are. I know about the red room," look said.

The words struck a pang of alarm in Natasha

"Barton is in my hands now. He follows commands, like the animal he really is. And he will kill you first, slowly, intimately, leaving you helplessly watching as he cuts off Valerie's limbs, one by one. I will ensure that Valerie will die screaming, and she will die knowing that her entire life had been a lie. Even if it means killing her myself."

The mental image terrified Steve. He never felt so glad that Valerie was asleep.

No. Not Valerie. Not her. She's a child, innocent. For God's sake, she threw a blueberry at Tony Stark and laughed hysterically when Tony tried to throw one back but failed. She was capable of forgiveness, as was shown when she accepted Tony's apology. She was kind, despite everything that has happened.

No. Like _hell_ will Loki get near Valerie. Not if Steve can help it.

"You monster," Natasha gasped, swallowing down a fake cry. Oh, she had him now.

"I shouldn't be the monster you'd be fearing."

"So, it's Banner you're trying to unleash."

"Pardon?"

"He's planning to unleash the Hulk," Natasha said into her ear piece. She uttered more instructions before turning around and saying, "Thank you for your cooperation."

Damn right Natasha was an agent, a classy one at that. But she couldn't refuse and she said politely. "Oh and I haven't broken a god's neck yet, but you'll be the first one if you ever try to hurt Valerie again."

"Is that a threat, Agent Romanoff?"

"No. It's a promise."

With that, Natasha turned on her heels and ran.


	12. Turn, Turn, Turn

Valerie was awake, with braid completely undone.

She was in the exit of the bridge when she saw the screens on the computers flash red. Everyone looked confused, pressing different keys and shouting out orders.

Then the entire helicarrier tilted sideways.

The window shattered and she tumbled down the stairs. The pain was stinging.

She fell on her arm and let out a small yelp. Something definitely scratched her cheek too.

She scooted as far back as she could and hid underneath the stairs. It was complete chaos.

Agents were running, calling out orders. Someone were loading guns, grabbing weapons, typing rapidly into their computer.

"Engine 1 is down!" called out Maria.

Valerie's eyes widened in alarm.

Then came gunshots.

She heard people calling for help. Some people screamed in pain. Gunshots rang out. More and more. No, no, no, this was a nightmare. It couldn't be real. No, no, n-

A body falling down in front of her son with an arrow sticking out their chest.

Valerie screamed.

There was blood, so much of it. Like her mother. Tears were falling, with fear pulsing everywhere through her veins. This wasn't happening, no, no, no. This couldn't be happening. _No._

This is what Natasha and her dad did? Kill people?

She pulled her knees to her chin and bit her sleeve, praying and hoping. Wanting all of this to be over.

* * *

Soon, the noise had died down. The engine stabilized, no longer rumbling has hard under the floor. Valerie tried to breathe, but found it difficult to move.

The body was dragged away. There was a familiar voice, calling out for her.

"Valerie?"

Not waiting an answer, Valerie crawled from under the stairs,t avoid the puddle and hugged Maria tightly. She didn't say anything as the brunette hugged her back. For those few minutes, the world had stopped spinning. The shock, the death, it was all settling in.

Maria sighed, "She's safe, Natasha, I got her. Only a few scrapes and bruises."

"I don't want to be alone," Valerie cried. "I'm scared."

"Come on Val, breathe," Maria said.

"I want my mom, I can't stand it anymore!" Valerie cried.

"I'm sorry, Valerie. I'm so sorry," Maria said. "It's..."

It's a terrible situation. Phil was stabbed. Agents were dead. Loki was playing them the whole time and it only took them this long to realize it. To him, they were all just pawns in a sick game of cat and mouse.

And now, thanks to him, there was a traumatized crying child in her arms, having seen death too much for someone her age. Having seen death at all. Not even three weeks ago, said child was covered in grass stains and laughing at her friends, _taunting_ them with the sarcasm that Maria knew was full Barton.

"It's going to get fixed. I'll protect you, Valerie. Sound good?"

Bless the kid's cooperation. Valerie nodded, wiping at her eyes. She held Maria's hand tightly and followed.

* * *

"What did you do?"

"Cognitive recalibration," Natasha replied. Seeing Clint's reaction, she added "I hit you really hard in the head."

"Good swing," Clint commented. He winced. "Too good."

"How are you feeling?" Natasha sat on the chair. Should it have been another situation or setting, Clint wouldn't have hesitated to pull her on his lap. But now, everything hurt. His head.

"Like the worst possible hangover imaginable."

"I wouldn't know," Natasha said. "I'm Russian. I'm immune to that."

"Nat...How many agents-"

"No. Do not do this to yourself, Clint," Natasha warned. "This...this is Loki. The bastard is worse than any target we've had before."

"How bad is the situation?"

"It's controlled. But..."

"But what?"

"Jessica is dead."

"What? How?!" For a moment, Clint thought about a car accident. It would have been terribly ironic.

But no, how could Jessica be dead? How in the world could she?

"Armed robbery."

"And Valerie?!"

"She's onboard."

Whoa.

"Wait what?! Natasha, that was such a _stupid_ idea."

"What, you don't think I know that?" Natasha snapped. "I couldn't leave her with anyone, not with the risk."

"But why onboard?!"

"Hey, she's my kid too, and I got her phone call before I was on my way here. She called me and told me Jessica was dead and-" Natasha stopped and sighed. She took a breath, rubbing her eyes. She remembered where she was. What the situation going on. "But she's okay. Maria has her now, and she's alright."

Clint could tell. It was personal now. She had that dangerous glint in her eye that promised a world of pain for her target. The fury, the incoming storm.

The wrath of a mother.

"Oh god, what did Loki do to you?"

"He threatened to kill Valerie."

"No one does that," Natasha clenched her fists. "No one dares to get near my daughter and hurt her. I have red in my ledger," she looked up at him. "I'd like to wipe it out. But if he gets even an inch from her, there will be more; but this time, the blood won't be from a human."

Clint let out a small smile. "Damn right." This was the woman he definitely fell in love with. Dangerous, beautiful,

"Nat, it's Hill. Valerie is asking for him."

"Send her in."

* * *

"Your dad is awake."

"What?!"

"Second door on the left, big window."

"Thank you!" Valerie took off in a sprint, with agents stepping out of the way as she ran in search for the med bay.

"Dad!"

Valerie jumped onto Clint, hugging him.

"Oh my sweet sweet girl," Clint sighed, hugging her tightly. He kissed the crown of her head, leaning into her shoulder. She was safe. She didn't get hurt by Loki. She wasn't hurt by him.

"I was so scared," Valerie cried.

"You're safe now. Are you hurt?"

A small bandaid was on her cheek, from where Maria had cleaned her up. "It's just a scratch," Valerie said.

The warmth reminded him that Loki's control was gone. The hit was too strong. His little girl was safe and alive, he didn't kill her. He didn't hurt her.

He cradled his little girl in his arms, as sore as they were. She was terrified, and nothing was going to hurt her. Not anymore.

"Dad...Mom is-"

"I know, baby girl. I was just told."

Valerie bit her lip, frowning. She was close to crying, Clint knew it.

"I'm so glad you're okay," Clint said,

"This is a bad situation, but you're a strong girl. Alright? Be strong for me kiddo and we'll deal with all of this afterwards," Clint said. "Can you do that?"

"I can try," Valerie said. "Wait, are you going?"

"I got to."

"But I just got you back!"

_What if you don't return?_

"As crazy as this sounds...Loki has an army of aliens and we're gonna kick them out of New York," Clint said.

* * *

Steve watched as Hawkeye cradled Valerie. Jesus, she did look like him. She looked up and smiled to Natasha, speaking to her.

Jesus, that resemblance.

She looked like Natasha. Like Clint.

Wait a minute...

What Loki said.

_Oh my god._

"Suit up," Steve commanded. "Assemble in five."

"Be careful. All of you," Valerie said.

"Do you have to?"

"I have to, baby. But don't worry," Clint said.

"I'll take good care of him, Val," Steve said from the doorway.

Valerie's lip was pursed, trembling a little bit. Clint hugged her one last time, kissed her temples.

"It's gonna be alright," Clint reassured. "You're gonna be with Maria and she'll take good care of you while I'm gone."

"You better be back," Valerie said. "All of you."

"We promise."

* * *

"What do we tell the council?"

"The truth. She was directly threatened by Loki and it's our job as SHIELD to protect her. Her legal guardian was murdered and she is the daughter of a current agent," Maria paused. "No, she's the daughter of an Avenger."

"Two Avengers."

Natasha stood at the doorway.

"If they ask, tell them that. If not, she is not even here."

"Sounds good to me."

Natasha nodded and walked off.

Valerie's curly hair could be spotted easily as she sat on the table, waiting for Maria.

"What has this agency gotten to? Babysitting?"

"Sir, we've sent Romanoff undercover to work for Stark. We have done our share of babysitting before."

Nick Fury shrugged. "Damn right, Hill. Damn right."


	13. After

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Annnnnnnnnd the most current one.

"Wheres Tony?" she asked.

"In the hole."

Maria's voice was grave,expression stone cold. She bit her lip and squeezed Valerie's hand, her eyes never leaving the screen.

"He's okay, Val, he's okay," Maria said sighing in relief.

Valerie sighed in relief and sat down on the chair.

No one dared moved her until the Avengers were in safety.

* * *

The first thing Valerie did after the Battle of Manhattan was hug Tony and apologize.

Right after everyone was sent to a small SHIELD medical hospital, she hugged him and apologized.

"I'm sorry for being so mean! I'm sorry for throwing a raspberry at you! I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," she cried.

Tony winced and pat her head. "Don't worry about it kid."

"I feel so bad!" she cried.

"It's alright kid. Don't worry about it," he flinched some more.

"Val, he's hurt," Steve said.

"Oh no!" Valerie jumped back, more years down her face. "I'm so sorry!"

Tony glared at Steve, pulling her back into the hug. "It's okay, kid. This is good pain, not bad pain."

"I'm so sorry," she hiccupped. "For all the mean things I said, for throwing a raspberry, I don't want anyone else to get hurt because of me."

"Valerie, no one is hurt just because of you. What happened today was because of a bad guy being bad. None of it had to do with you. Alright? It's okay. C'mon, c'mon, take a breath," Tony patted her shoulder. "It's alright, kid. It's alright," he said soothingly. "See? Your dad is okay, he's napping. We are all okay. Worse we got were a few bruises."

"You almost died."

"But I'm here now."

She was a kid. A terrified kid, who had just lost her mother and witnessed the destruction of her city.

"I'm so sorry," Valerie said softly.

"No need to apologize, Val."

"No more death," Valerie said. "Just no more."

"I agree."

* * *

"C'mon, up you go Val," Clint lifted her up, grunting a little bit with the weight.

Valerie jolted awake, startled and a bit disoriented until she saw Clint. Her expression softened and she leaned back again, closing her eyes.

"Daddy?"

"I'm here kiddo," Clint said softly. "What's up?"

"I love you."

"I love you too. Just get some sleep," Clint said.

Valerie nodded and nestled back into him.

"So she's your kid," Tony said.

"Yeah."

Clint was holding a sleeping Valerie in his arms, not letting go. He wasn't going to let her get out of his sight for as long as he needed. She was getting big now, so big.

"She'll be safe," Clint said. "I'm not gonna let any evil bastard lay a finger on her."

Tony believed him.

* * *

"So, you and Hawkeye got hitched," Tony said.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Are you kidding? She looks exactly like you."

"No she doesn't."

"Yes she does. The curls, the nose, the smile, her tendency to throw fruits at me when, her words not mine, 'I'm being annoying'," Tony said. "Face it, she's gonna be a little Natasha. Soon, she'll be flipping guys who catcall her over in the boxing ring."

Natasha cracked a smile. "Happy still hasn't let that go?"

"Not at all."

"She likes you, Tony. Well, she hates you but now she likes you."

"What can I say? She's a good kid. A little on the loud soccer side, but still so goddamn adorable," Tony leaned back in his chair.

"Things haven't been easy for her," Natasha said. "Not...well, not since Jessica passed. And now, with the rest of the world being thrown off by this whole mess, it isn't going to be the same."

"What do you mean?"

"It feels that we are at war," Natasha said.

The tense silence filled the air.

"Ever since Thor came into the picture, we had no idea just how big the universe really is. There are threats bigger than us, bigger than what we faced today. And I know what I am. You know what you are. I am a spy and we are no soldiers, but this was just the start."

"Think the media will find out about her?"

"God no," Natasha said. "I will break a few cameras if I have to prevent that from happening."

"I'm surprised you didn't say break a few necks."

"I have that reserved for Loki."

"You almost fulfilled that. Jesus Natashalie, you _broke_ his jaw," Tony said. "You broke the Norse god of Mischief's _jaw_."

Natasha shrugged. "Be glad that Clint held me back or else I _would_ have broken his neck," she pulled her hair back into a short ponytail. "But SHIELD does want their prisoners alive, most of the time. I had to restrain myself."

"As if. Anyways, already talked with your not so secret lover about the whole Avengers thing. That we're a team. You know, you're completely welcome to move into the tower once it's finished being remodeled," Tony said. "Maybe it'll give the kid a chance to start over, a new place. I'll even have an indoor soccer field just for her."

"Look at you, Stark. You _do_ have a heart."

Tony rolled his eyes. "The kid grew on me, alright? She reminded me of the fact that there's still good in this world."

"I will think about it."

"I know a thing or two about being given new chances to start over. And hey, she will never be a bother. Rhodey is good with kids. Pepper _loves_ them. Jarvis likes company. Happy might get scared from the mini Natasha."

At that, Natasha smiled a little bit. "Now that will definitely make me consider it some more."

**Author's Note:**

> No, I'm not crying at the nostalgia this fanfic is giving me, you're the one crying what the fuck


End file.
